i am not at senior week. i am not at senior week. i am not at senior week.

cry.cry.cry.cry

getting day time wasted by myself.

:’(

Mixed emotions..most of them sad. It’s not like graduating from high school is that big of an achievement so I’m mostly just going to miss seeing all of my friends for six hours everyday.

I’m probably going to be a mess at the ceremony tonight. I wish I was going to senior week sooooo badly. But instead, I’m being shipped off to the other side on Sunday and won’t be back until the end of July. Fuck China.

:’(

So upset. I had it all worked out in my head that I was going to go to senior week for one night before I leave for China. Since I don’t fly away until Sunday afternoon, I wanted to go down Saturday night and just squish all of senior week into those 12 hours.

BUT I just found out that my crazy mother’s travel itinerary has us scheduled to leave my house at 7AM on Sunday, which means I would have to leave the beach at like 4 in the morning. Not only do I not think I will even by sober by then, it just makes it seem even less worthwhile for me to drive myself back and forth (7 hours of driving total) just to spend all of like 15 hours there, especially if it means I’m going to be so horribly tired and have a 90% risk of getting in a car accident at that hour/state.

I wanted to go for that one night so so so badly. I don’t want to go to China anymore at all. I’m going to miss so much stuff this Summer because I will be on the other side of this damn world for two months, stuck behind that dumb censorship shit and be cut off from the rest of civilization.

Yes. I know I’m being a dramatic little bitch.

So so tired, cannot believe I have to do this prom business again tomorrow night.

BUT I’M LEGAL BETCHEZ!! Happy birthday to me :)